Hereâ€™s a question for you. When are you old? Are you old at fifty years or is it more like sixty? Many years ago you were old when you were thirty; nowadays we live longer so it appears to have moved backward. Letâ€™s call it sixtyâ€¦what happens on the day you turn sixty? You go to bed middle aged and shazzam you wake up old. Thatâ€™s a bit rough. So why am I suddenly concerned with how old I am? Well Iâ€™m not really; Iâ€™m not old, not for a fair while anyway. Itâ€™s because I was doing some research on maxi scooters and discovered that as I thought the average rider isâ€¦old. In fact after more exhaustive research it appears the likelihood of a young person buying a maxi scooter is 1 in 9,899,9999,345,678. This isâ€¦not very likely then.
All this research has caused me to come up with my own theory, see I donâ€™t think itâ€™s quite as simple as â€˜old people ride maxiâ€™sâ€™. I believe thereâ€™s far more to it than that. I believe itâ€™s a conspiracy of withering proportions; something that could tear at the very fabric of our society. I believe that Maxi scooters actually make you old. Thatâ€™s right, the very second you purchase one and ride out of dealerâ€¦OLD. Instant oldness. Whatâ€™s worse is that you donâ€™t even know itâ€™s happened. This is why so many maxi scooter owners are older. Itâ€™s beyond your control entirely. Remember this as youâ€™re drawn towards the latest super maxi scooter. It could be your last day as a young man/woman.